First impression may not be the last, but it does leave a lasting image. Reserve those sexy clothes for dates, and go for something more old-school. At the same time, you don’t have to dress to the dimes. A pretty kurta teamed with tights is your safest options. The look is simple and chic.
Take a gift along
It’s your first time at their place. You don’t want to go empty-handed. Parents want to feel respected for their position. So take some time out from your schedule, and go gift shopping with your guy.
• Wonder if actress Nargis Fakri followed the ‘rules’ when she reportedly dropped in at actor-producer Uday Chopra’s residence to meet his parents recently
Buy them something they would use or need. Don’t opt for something exorbitant or fancy. Like your clothes, keep the gift simple. You don’t want it to come across like a bribe.
The aim of this meeting is to win the parents over. Treat it like a job interview. Do your homework. If you can, find out more about them in advance. Get a sense of the family’s culture. Ask your boyfriend about their likes and dislikes, so that you know what direction to veer your conversation in.
Let them do the talking
Once you’ve exchanged the pleasantries, follow their cues and let them start the talking. Avoid being overfriendly or too restrained. Sit back, and learn more about your ‘to-be’ through them.
Once you have warmed up sufficiently, start sharing stuff about yourself. Although you may be awkward in a situation like this, you don’t want them to think you are withholding information. A good idea is to rehearse a mock conversation with your boyfriend.
Spare the man
Chances are that most of your conversation will revolve around the boy. Sharing stories and wanting to know more about him can be tempting, but see to it that you don’t get together with his parents and pick on him. His parents might want you to spill the beans about his quirks, but respect him and avoid it.
Don’t be a know-it-all
So, you know everything from the colour of his favourite shirt to how he loves mixing sauce with anything that he eats. Good for you. But don’t be Miss Blah-Blah in front of his parents.
Understand that they know him better than you. Families can get fiercely protective. Even if you’re truly-madly-deeply in love, they’ll feel like they’ve got years on you. So relax, and go with the flow.
Refrain from PDA
Sit next to your guy, but avoid holding hands. Don’t even think about cuddling. Sure, their parents aren’t stupid and know that the two of you may have been up to mischief. But don’t flash it in their face. Be graceful.
Watch his ways
He may not be the otherwise loony-puppy-in-love around his parents. Instead, he may behave like a tantrum-throwing teenager. As long as he isn’t being a brat, you can relax.
However, if he’s being too evasive or mean to you, have a chat with him post the rendezvous, and tell him that you didn’t appreciate his behaviour. It’s important that he treats you well in front of his parents.
Ignore the ex-factor
Okay, so they may have been completely smitten by one of his ex-girlfriends. Perhaps, your guy even brought her home. But don’t be too bothered. It’s the story of his past and doesn’t matter anymore. If his folks bring it up, don’t dig too much. Smile and simply change the subject. He loves you and they love him.
And if you don’t hit it off with them at the outset, don’t beat yourself black and blue about it. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps, like you, they too were shy and needed time to open up. Remember, there’s always a second chance.
► The aim of this meeting is to win the parents over. Treat it like a job interview
Copyright 2008 Bennett Coleman & Co. Ltd. . All rights reserved.